Love Doesn’t Come and Stay for Good. You Have to Learn These Communication Tricks

Have you at any point discovered yourself whining about your sentimental relationship to a companion. Ever heard yourself saying things like:

“He just never tunes in to me!”

“She doesn’t converse with me when she’s furious!”

“I simply feel like we contend constantly.”

Prepare to have your mind blown. You may need to build up your relational abilities with your loved one.

No one Can Get Along with Another Person 100% of the Time

Investing a considerable measure of energy with someone else builds the likelihood that both of you won’t generally concur with each other. Keep in mind, that is typical. No one can coexist with someone else 100% of the time. In any case, these differences can without much of a stretch transform into contentions in the event that you don’t take a shot at enhancing your relational abilities.

All Relationship Problems Originate with Bad Communication Skills

Having great relational abilities increment your odds of having an upbeat, satisfying, and fruitful relationship.1 If you both cooperate toward enhancing your relational abilities, your relationship will start to develop and create in ways you didn’t think conceivable some time recently. Keep in mind, all relationship issues begin with awful correspondence skills.2

To kick you off, how about we investigate the absolute most basic correspondence pitfalls seeing someone and deceives you can use to accomplish enhanced relational abilities.

4 Deadly Communication Pitfalls You Must Avoid

Letting your emotions take over.

When
you get into a disagreement with your partner, it can be easy to let
anger work its way into the conversation. Susan Heitler, PhD and couples
psychologist, says, “The hotter you get, the more likely it is that
you’ll race full speed ahead down the criticism and blame road.”3
How many times have one of your disagreements turned into you blaming them for something?

Using blaming language.

While
talking to your partner, if you begin a statement with “you always”, it
sets the conversation up for an argument and makes the listener think
you don’t want to work as a team.4 This is because your partner will automatically become defensive, expecting to be blamed for something.

Listening to respond instead of listening to understand.

If
you find yourself thinking of how you’re going to respond to what your
partner is saying, you’re far more likely to interrupt them.
Interrupting your partner lets them know that you don’t really care
about what they have to say. 5 And this obviously won’t end well.

Avoiding difficult conversations.

Maybe
there’s a specific topic that the two of you can never discuss without
an argument. You assume that the best thing to do is to avoid the
difficult conversations, so you two avoid a heated discussion.

Only 4 Tricks Are Needed To Make A Change

Give yourself a brief moment of silence.

If
you feel yourself getting angry or you catch yourself criticizing your
partner, take a step back from the conversation. You need a moment to
think and maybe even get away from your partner for a few minutes. If
neither of you can calm down, consider having the conversation at a
later date. Emotions do not allow for healthy communication skills.

Use “I” statements and “we” language instead.

Make your feeling or thoughts clear and present them in a non-critical way by using “I” statements.6
Saying
something like “I feel” or “I worry” is much better than “you did X”.
Also, remind your partner that you view your relationship as a team by
using “we” language to be more inclusive.

Stop interrupting and be aware of the body language.

It’s more than that, though. It’s easy to wait for your turn to speak. Instead, try to really understand what they’re saying.
Paying
attention to their body language and facial expressions can help you
really understand the point that your partner is trying to make.7

Talk about everything. Literally.

Confront
the awkward conversations and difficult topics. Having a healthy,
long-term relationship means being able to deal with everything
together, as a team.
The more of these uncomfortable
discussions the two of you can have, the more confident and trusting
you’ll feel in your relationship.8
In
the end, working on improving your communication skills with your
partner will give you a much healthier relationship. A relationship
where the two of you can focus on growing as individuals and as a team.

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Updated: September 9, 2017 — 11:35 pm

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